Oh Dog of Shitty Posture

Oh dog of shitty posture
Listing to the right.
A vision of a crumpled mess
In coat of dingy white.

Oh dog of shitty posture
Slumped upon your hip.
A broken, melted candle.
A slowly sinking ship.

Oh dog of shitty posture,
What happened to your pride?
Why don’t you sit up on your feet,
Instead of on your side?


National Donut Day

Some holidays get a
Big, loud parade
Or concert halls where
Music is played.

Some holidays get
Flags a-waving
At monuments with
Marble engraving.

But my favorite day
Gets none of this stuff.
The fact that it’s here
Is joyous enough.

Just to eat a good donut
At work or at play
Is the best way to honor
National Donut Day.

Happy National Donut Day, everyone!
May your joy grow with your waistline!


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Lately, I've been writing longer-form humor pieces over on Medium. Like this one:

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