Q: What do you call a talk by a pro-logging candidate?
A: A stump speech
Q: What kind of talk does a confused candidate give?
A: A stumped speech
Q: When did the candidate decide to run for office?
A: When he was being chased
Q: Why was the bag of dried fruit so loud?
A: Because the candydates would never shut up
Q: Why did the candidate stand for reelection?
A: Hemorrhoids
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