9/12/2008

Politicalamity

I listen to the "Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!" podcast on a weekly basis at the gym. It's not only funny: it's self-defense against the bad 90's pop blaring out of the overhead speakers. And it's my main source of important news.

At the end of each show, the panel is asked to come up with suggestions for what might happen in some relevant current affairs topic. This week's topic was, "What's the next big news bombshell to be dropped about either Vice-Presidential candidate."

I haven't yet been asked to be on the show, no matter how often I check email looking for their request, so I didn't have the chance to answer in person. But here's how I wanted to answer from my perch atop the elliptical running machine:

Sarah Palin will be joined next week by John McCain's selections for his Cabinet: boys and girls from a local preschool. This stunning move will serve several purposes and further the chances of a winning Republican ticket:

  • They'll appeal to the common man because, heck, we were all kids once. And they're so darned cute! Why not give them a chance?
  • The children will distract attention from the subject of Palin's experience. (You could say that the cabinet's experience will pale in experience to hers.)
  • They will bring the average age of the administration down to reasonable number.
  • With several infants in the group, this Cabinet will bring a real sense of 'Change' to the ticket.
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