Video: Bunny Day

Today, a slight departure from my usual "Enough About You..." fare: a nature movie.

I went with the kids and a friend of theirs to Zeum in San Francisco yesterday and made this claymation pic.

A Letter from Santa

Christmas Cartoon

2009 was a tough year for Santa and his helpers

Saturday Comics: Hungry Times

Things I Believe

Anything worth doing is worth doing right
away.

Measure twice, cut once.
Then have your finger reattached before trying a second cut.

Misery loves company memos.

When I am King: FacerealityBook

When I am King...

Social networks will be more realistic.

For a social networking site, Facebook is vastly different from any society I’ve ever been a part of. Instead, it’s like a great big warm hug from your friends, smothering you in caresses of affirmation and "You go girl!" and "LOL!"s until you can’t breathe for all of the positive reinforcement.

A typical status update may be something like, "I really want that danish … but I shouldn’t!" followed by scores of comments like, "You deserve it!" and "Me too!" and "Go on, just one can’t hurt. Or even two! :):):)"

It’s like a magic eight ball, only the random answer generator is made up of real people, just trying to give you the answer you want.

When I am King, social networks will keep it real. There won’t just be “friends” you can add to your circle, but your circle will instead include arch-enemies, vague acquaintances, and random lookers-on. Any question or status posted to the ether will solicit real responses from people that honestly don’t give a damn. The same danish-pining post above may engender responses like "So?", "Then don’t, fatty. Now piss off." and "Skip the Danes, try the Swedes!", plus some random heavy-breathing comments. And maybe a homeless guy asking for change. That’s what a social network is all about – honest answers to life’s questions.

Now, back to work. Or should I go get a donut instead?

Things I Believe

Limitation is the sincerest form of flat.

A bird in the handle is worth two in the bushel.

Today is the first word of the rest of this sentence.

Holiday Tales

Thanksgiving always puts me in a thoughtful mood. Then it puts me to sleep.

This year, I'm thinking about some books I'd like to write. I'm pretty close to finished, since I've already thought of the titles:

• Get Stuffed: An Eater’s Guide to Thanksgiving
• One Foot in the Grave, One Leg in the Throat: Proper Turkey Eating Habits
• Gravyboat Train: The Butterball Turkey Story
• Feaster Famine: When the Turkey’s Gone
• Fowl Balls: I Can’t Believe I Ate the Whole Turkey
• Turkey Brothel: A Hard-Boiled Tail
  

Totally Adequate: Thanksgiving Edition

Being Totally Adequate is not just a part-time responsibility; you're on all the time. This is even more true for the holidays, when events necessitate putting up with other people and impressing them all with your adequacy.

If someone invites you for Thanksgiving dinner, try to be your most Totally Adequate self:

• Bring cheap wine. Don't take the chance that your hosts aren’t wine people and wouldn’t appreciate the thought and expense.
• Don’t shower or dress up that day. These people invited you, not some gussied-up image of you. So just come as you are.
• Try to dominate the conversation at the table with tales about yourself. For one thing, this removes the awkward silences as everyone tries to think of something appropriate to say. Besides, these people are probably really interested in knowing more about you or else they wouldn’t have invited you.
• If your hosts don’t offer, ask if you can take home the leftovers. It’s usually a chore finding room in the fridge for all of it, so you’ll be helping out. Besides, you can eat well for a week on that stuff. Don’t take everything, though; leave the stuff you don’t like, with appropriate phrases like, “You can keep this – it was pretty gross.”

Be part of what you can be: Be Totally Adequate.

Things I Believe About Traveling

When packing, you will only remember the next-to-last item after you have zipped your luggage.
You will remember the final item after your plane has taken off.

In Belgium, “medium rare steak” translates to “cow sushi”