These are Chet originals. At least as far as I know.
When I was in high school, my parents sent me on an exchange program.
They were so surprised when I returned.
Did you hear about the guy that only drank beer and wine?
He thought the hard stuff was too whiskey.
Or how about the grumbler that avoided hard liquor?
He would only drink beer and whine.
Home is where the mortgage is.
Where do bulimics work out?
And in my first and probably only foray into political humor:
What do you call a vacuum cleaner in Iraq?
A weapon of mess destruction